That would be awful, I wouldn't spent my 45p on that crap.

Your time will come...

An 8-year-old choir boy catches the priest masturbating.

He said, "What are you doing father"?

"It's called masturbating" the priest replied, "You'll be doing this soon".

"Why father" he asked?

"Because my wrist is killing me" the priest replied.

Stem Cell Research

They have finally got it right...

Twice the fun and half the nagging:

Q: WHAT ARE THE SMALL BUMPS AROUND A WOMAN'S NIPPLES FOR?
A: It's Braille for 'suck here'.
---------------------------------------------------------------
Q: WHAT IS AN AUSTRALIAN KISS?
A: It's the same as a French kiss, but 'down under.'
---------------------------------------------------------------
Q: WHAT DO YOU DO WITH 365 USED CONDOMS?
A: Melt them down, make a tyre, and call it a Good year.
---------------------------------------------------------------
Q: WHY WERE HURRICANES NORMALLY NAMED AFTER WOMEN?
A: Because when they're wild, wet and scream when they come But when they go, they take your house and car with them.
---------------------------------------------------------------
Q: WHY DO GIRLS RUB THEIR EYES WHEN THEY GET UP IN THE MORNING?
A: Because they don't have any balls to scratch...
---------------------------------------------------------------
Q: WHAT IS A MAN'S ULTIMATE EMBARASSMENT?
A: Running into a wall with a hard on and breaking his nose.

A Navy Destroyer stops four Muslims in a row boat, rowing towards the south coast of England.

The captain gets on the loud hailer and shouts,
"Ahoy, small craft, where are you heading?"

One of the Muslims stands up and shouts,
"We are invading England!"

The crew of the Destroyer all start laughing and when the captain finally stops laughing, he gets back on the loud hailer and says,"Just the four of you?"

The Muslim stands up again and shouts,
"No, we're the last four, the rest are already there!"

.

Life is like a penis - simple, relaxed and hanging free...

It's women who make it hard !!!


.

From a friend from France...

Fiscalité

Lucienne prostituée depuis plus de 30 ans est perdue dans toute ces histoires de changement de TVA.

Alors pour s'y retrouver elle téléphone à son comptable et lui demande, dites pour une Pipe, la TVA est à 5,5 % ou 19,6 % ?

Son comptable lui répond c'est du 19,6 %, mais si vous avalez c'est 5,5 % car c'est considéré comme de la restauration rapide.

========================//==============================

Google Translation:

Tax System

Lucienne prostitute for over 30 years is lost in all these stories of change of VAT.

Then to navigate her phone and asks his accountant, say for Pipe, VAT is 5.5% or 19.6%?

His accountant tells him it's 19.6%, but if you swallow it is 5.5% because it is considered fast food.

LOL x 3

Former President Bush and former VP Cheney are sitting in a bar on the outskirts of Dallas .

A guy walks in and asks the barman, 'Isn't that Bush and Cheney sitting over there?'
The bartender says, 'Yep, that's them.'

So the guy walks over and says, 'Wow, this is a real honor! What are you guys doing in here?'

Bush says, 'We're planning WW III.'
The guy says, 'No shit? Can I ask what's going to happen?'

Cheney says, 'Well, we're going to kill 140 million Muslims and a blonde with big tits'.

The guy says "Holy Shit! Why would you kill a blonde with big tits?'

Cheney turns to Bush and says, 'See, George, I told you nobody would give a fuck about the 140 million Muslims.'

the casual racism on this thread is appalling. fucktards.