A 93 yearly man is sitting on a bench crying his eyes out. When a passer by asks
What's the matter.
The old man says I've a 23 year old girlfriend who wants sex 6 times a day.
Passer by says that's great isn't it why are you crying
The old man replies I can't remember where I live

Wayne Rooney says he is absolutely gutted about being sent off in the 32
Minute of tonights game!

Clearly his dad placed a much bigger bet on 73 minutes.

Apologies before I start

A girl goes up to the drugstore counter and says, "I'd like a box of condoms."

The druggist says, "Don't want to have any kids, eh?"

She says, "No, my boyfriend doesn't want to get any shit on his cock."

A young boy tells his dad he's gay. The dad turns to his other son and asks what about you .The other son replies yes Dad I'm gay to.
The Dad screams doesn't anyone one in this family like fanny
I do Dad replied his daughter.

Politically incorrect British humor . . .


British Humor . . . .
I was devastated to find out my wife was having an affair but, by turning
to religion, I was soon able to come to terms with the whole thing.
I converted to Islam, and we're stoning her in the morning!
-----------------------------------------------------------
The wife suggested I get myself one of those dick enlargers, so I did....
she's 21 and her name's Lucy.
-----------------------------------------------------------
Went to the pub with my girlfriend last night. Locals were shouting "pedophile!" and other names at me, just because my girlfriend is 21 and I'm 50. It completely spoiled our 10th anniversary.
-----------------------------------------------------------
My son was thrown out of school today for letting a girl in his class give
him a hand-job. I said "Son, that's 3 schools this year! You'd better stop
before you're banned from teaching altogether."
-----------------------------------------------------------
Question - Are there too many immigrants in Britain ?
17% said yes; 11% said No; 72% said "I am not understanding the question please."

Michael Jackson trial.......
Dr Conrad Murray was explaining Michaels dramatic weight loss.
He had got so thin his pyjama tops were adult size but he was still able to squeeze into children's bottoms.

Good one! however as Dr. Phil so rightly points out.......
http://i1177.photobucket.com/albums/x344/Motorfeet/DrPhil.jpg

Paul mccartney is already complaining about his new wife. Apparently she's doing double the money on shoes